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sabotage

How Even Super Successful People Can Sabotage Themselves

I was recently at a networking meeting where there was a guest speaker.  I had travelled some miles to go to this meeting because I was super excited.  The guest speaker was a highly successful small business owner like me – but he was ahead of where I am – in terms of revenue – he was into the multi millions, and we are not quite at that point yet!

I met a few other people at the event and they seemed equally excited to be about to listen to this highly successful millionaire. The crowd hushed – he was introduced – he smiled and opened his mouth to say his first words……and that’s when it all started to go wrong!

You see, here’s what happened.  He spent the next 20 minutes telling us about how amazing he was.  He bragged and boasted about his lifestyle and his possessions.  I guess he thought he was motivating people, and I guess there were a few people who were excited by that, but the vast majority sat there thinking “Well it’s great you have a helicopter, but I don’t even have a car I can rely on, and you’re not telling me anything that’s going to help me change that”.

I saw people get up and leave the room.  The audience participation dwindled to a few devotees.  And afterwards at the drinks reception all I heard was “big mouth”, “show off”, “arrogant”.

And that’s a shame – because if you could get past the bragging and listen to the great information that was actually there in his presentation, then there were some golden nuggets.  I persisted because, even though I also found him difficult to listen to, I knew that he had to know some cool stuff to get where he is.  However, I totally understood why some of the other people left.  Had the guy not been as successful as he is, I think he’d had been playing to an empty room by the end.

And it made me wonder, how many other ‘leaders’ are unaware of the impact they are having.  Now I cant say for certain that this chap actually cared a jot about the impact he was having.  Perhaps he didn’t.  In which case – no problem for him.

However, if he DID want to actually offer some benefit to others.  If he hoped to inspire people to follow in his path.  If he wanted to recruit people into his business.  Then he went about it the exact wrong way.  Rather than thinking about what THEY needed to hear, he only thought about what HE wanted to say.

He didn’t understand his audience.  And that’s a problem.  If you want to lead people and expand your business, then you need to understand the people on your team.  You need to meet them where they are at.  And that is no doubt, individual for each person.

You need to show empathy and understanding.

If this man had thought about it, the people coming to hear him speak were just a bunch of regular small business owners, some more successful than others but none in his league.  What they wanted to hear was how he had once been like them, until he figured some stuff out, and then he found success. They wanted some golden nuggets for sure (which were in there), but most of all they wanted to feel understood.

They didn’t want to feel like big fat losers.  Which is how he made them feel with his approach.  They felt like he was throwing his success in their faces in a way which almost said – “Why are you playing so small?  What is wrong with you that your business can’t give you all of this stuff that I have”.

As I said – I’m pretty sure it wasn’t his intention to have that impact on them.

The other lesson here of course, is that if you are aware of others impact on you, and you can manage that appropriately then you can still get what you want out of an interaction.

Most of the people at the event seemed to have gone there to learn from this guy.  Very few did.  They allowed the impact he had on them to undermine their hopes of what they wanted from the event.  They undermined themselves!  This happens a lot.

Perhaps you have a colleague or business partner that has a certain impact on you.  That can be positive or negative.  If you do not take ownership of your response to them then you are giving away your power.

For example, I once had a colleague at work who cheered up everyones day.  He was the office piece of sunshine.  And everyone relied on him to bring the mood up.  There was one person in particular who came to rely on Charlie for their daily dose of optimism.  When Charlie moved on, this person struggled to cope.  Literally.  And they left not long afterwards.

More often the opposite is true.  Perhaps you have a colleague who drives you mad.  You might find you are spend time complaining about them, worrying about them or looking for ways to sabotage them or at least avoid them.  What you may have missed out on is their strengths (everyone has them).

I once had a colleague who got up everyone’s nose.  They were always buying the latest gadget and showing it to everyone, in minute detail!  And they were renowned for avoiding as much work as possible.  I decided I would invite them for lunch as perhaps if I knew them better, it would be easier for me to work with them.

Well, it was an eye opener.  This guy was isolated.  He had no-one in his life and the only way he got any self esteem was to buy himself all the latest stuff so he would get some attention from others.  Now I have to be honest and say he didn’t become my best friend after that lunch.  However, what I did realise was that he wasn’t lazy when it came to doing all the paperwork, it was just that his only interaction in life was with the people he met in and through work.  He also had great attention to detail and was very organised.  So, we made him ‘social secretary’.

He ended up doing a great job and changing many people’s opinion of him.  He was unaware of the impact he previously had.  But equally the team had been missing out on his skills because they dismissed him out of hand, as boring.

So, my question to you this week is – are you aware of the impact you are having?  If you aren’t getting the results you want from your team it can be difficult to objectively understand why.  Drop me a line to [email protected] and let’s book in a call where I can give you some advice on understanding the impact you are having as a leader.

3D Leadership – dynamically enhancing the results of your business’™

At Transforming Performance, we believe that there are 6 crucial areas of Leadership: focus and direction, mindset, engagement, skills, impact and systems.

Transforming Performance can help with our Accelerate Your Business™ and Accelerate Solo™ programmes.

Julie Hutchison is co-Director with Jan Sargent of Transforming Performance, a consultancy which provides businesses with expert support in Leadership Coaching, Team Development and Performance Coaching, Executive Coaching, Mentoring, Training and Behavioural Profiling and help in getting the best from you and your people. If you’d like to have a chat and a coffee to discuss how we can help you, we’d love to talk. Call us on:

01722 484155 or 07947 823842

[email protected]

http://www.transformingperformance.co.uk

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Congratulations You Just Got Promoted!

Have you recently been promoted to a management position? Of course, you are feeling happy and celebratory and excited!   Or maybe not?

You see sometimes when people are promoted to a management position it isn’t as exciting or joyful as they hoped it would be.  What normally happens is that people get promoted because they are great at their job.  You are no doubt great at the job you have been promoted from, and that was a big part of why you were chosen.

The problem is that being a manager and being a technical specialist are two very different things.  And the skill set required for both are very different.

Often though, that is not factored into promotion decisions and you are just expected to somehow know how to manage and get the best out of other people.  Sometimes that’s OK, as you may naturally be a ‘people person’ and be able to get the best out of others without knowing exactly how you do it.

At other times you may have had some management training and be equipped with some of the skills required. But it is still a daunting prospect – having to manage people you worked alongside not so long ago.

And often it isn’t the (just) the management skills that are lacking – it is the confidence that you can make the transition.  I mean – these people might know rather more about you than they would do, were you a newly recruited manager coming into the company for the first time.

Perhaps there are other people who didn’t get the promotion you got and you are concerned about managing them in case they feel resentful.  Maybe you have been out drinking with the team you are now managing, and they have seen you at – shall we say – less than your best.

The fact is, that whether you lack confidence because you have had no training, or because you have previously worked with the people you are managing, there is only one solution.  And that is to decide to be confident.

Easily said I know – but it really does come down to realising that someone somewhere thought you were up to the job, and the people you are managing deserve to have a confident leader.  Now that doesn’t mean that you have all the answers, and in fact you probably DON’T yet.  And that’s OK.  Please don’t pretend you do, or feel you have to go in all guns blazing, because that wont endear you to anyone.

But do be confident, that you are meant to be in this position and that you are capable of doing a great job.

Now there are skills, techniques and tactics you can use as a Manager, that we teach in our Think, Be, Do Leadership Model.  And if you think you could benefit from some help in this area, why not book one of our free monthly strategy sessions where we will share with you some things you can implement right away to help your confidence and results as a new leader.

Email me on [email protected] and let’s get you booked in!

3D Leadership – dynamically enhancing the results of your business’™

At Transforming Performance, we believe that there are 6 crucial areas of Leadership: focus and direction, mindset, engagement, skills, impact and systems.

Transforming Performance can help with our Accelerate Your Business™ and Accelerate Solo™ programmes.

Jan Sargent is co-Director with Julie Hutchison of Transforming Performance, a consultancy which provides businesses with expert support in Leadership Coaching, Team Development and Performance Coaching, Executive Coaching, Mentoring, Training and Behavioural Profiling and help in getting the best from you and your people. If you’d like to have a chat and a coffee to discuss how we can help you, we’d love to talk. Call us on:

07947 823842 or 01722 484155

[email protected]

http://www.transformingperformance.co.uk

oppurtunitydudeee

2 Pint Sized Children Or A Pack Of Mongolian Business Owners?

No – it’s not a trick question, and neither is this…..

Have you ever thought about doing something new but then stopped yourself, because you thought It won’t work”  or “I am not that kind of person”, or maybe “It’s just too hard”?

Well, that was me last Sunday.

A lovely woman (Monica) who I met about 5 or 6 years ago, asked me what I was doing on Sunday.

“Relaxing with my 2 small children”, was my first thought, but then she put an idea to me that I found very curious, quite exciting and a little worrying too.

She asked me; “Can you deliver some training to my group of Mongolian Business owners?”

Err… maybe.

I was to deliver a two hour webinar (originally supposed to be 1 hour but then we realised that we needed translation as only 1 or 2 of them spoke any English!) to 25 Mongolian business owners who wanted to develop their leadership skills.

Monica saw our recent webinar about the THINK, BE, DO™ principles of 3D leadership, and realised that it doesn’t matter about country or language, when it comes to great leadership principles and practice – our 3D Leadership model JUST makes good sense.

I was a bit sceptical that we would keep their interest if the language barrier was too strong (my Mongolian is not word perfect lol).  However, we gave it a go.

What I found was that I had a ball and so did they! We got over the barriers, it took a bit more effort, more patience and a bit of jiggery pokery BUT I learned that there are people we can help all over the world even if we need to make a bit of extra effort.

I also realised that we should embrace the opportunities that come our way, and be brave and look how we can make things work, rather than letting unfamiliarity become a barrier. I needed to step out of my comfort zone, and just do it.

And because I did, we now have a bunch of wonderful people who want to join our new Leaders With Impact Facebook Group, lots of people signing up to our leadership tips at www.teamperformanceengine.uk and a whole load of new opportunities in another country.

So, what opportunities are you being offered and which of those are you taking up? Are you grabbing the opportunity and saying “YES” in true Richard Branson style?  Or are you leaving it on the table because it’s a bit out of your comfort zone?

Well, here’s my invite to join our facebook group too and if you like – go get our free leadership report and tips here.

But only if it is time to step out of YOUR comfort zone !

3D Leadership – dynamically enhancing the results of your business’™

At Transforming Performance, we believe that there are 6 crucial areas of Leadership: focus and direction, mindset, engagement, skills, impact and systems.

Transforming Performance can help with our Accelerate Your Business™ and Accelerate Solo™ programmes.

Julie Hutchison is co-Director with Jan Sargent of Transforming Performance, a consultancy which provides businesses with expert support in Leadership Coaching, Team Development and Performance Coaching, Executive Coaching, Mentoring, Training and Behavioural Profiling and help in getting the best from you and your people. If you’d like to have a chat and a coffee to discuss how we can help you, we’d love to talk. Call us on:

01722 484155 or 07947 823842

[email protected]

http://www.transformingperformance.co.uk

time management

You Can’t Manage Time

Have you ever been on a time management course?  It becomes very clear very quickly that the title of the course about “Time Management” is probably an oxymoron.  I mean you can’t manage time can you?

I’m guessing that you, like me, have 24 hours in a day.  There isn’t much you can do about it.  You can be more productive of course, and you can learn how and when to delegate, but you can’t make more time, and you can’t manage it.  2pm is 2pm, not 2.15!

The only thing you CAN manage is yourself.  You can learn how to make sure you spend your time wisely – doing the things that will impact your business the most.  You can learn how and when to delegate and who to delegate to, to get rid of some tasks whilst developing someone else, which will free up some of your time.

People refer to this as ‘creating more time’ but that’s nonsense of course.  You can’t create time.  But you can ‘free up’ some time.

You can prioritise your tasks so the important thing get done and the non priority tasks are dealt with in another way, or not dealt with because they don’t need to be.

And most importantly you can begin to think differently about what you are doing and why YOU are doing it.  Because of course, all change, all actions begin with a change of thoughts.

There is a bit more to it than that, but we have discovered a formula which – when you apply it to your business – will help you create a bigger and better Impact in your business by using our 3 Dimensions of Leadership. There are 3 areas that will create high performing teams in your business so that you can reclaim a day a week, be more productive, happier and less busy. Your staff will be happier, achieve more and will be an engaged team working towards the goals of your business.

I need a bit more time to really go into detail about this simple process – so if you would like to know more I invite you to spend and hour with Jan and me, next week on the 11th October, when we are hosting a webinar.

Hope to see you there

3D Leadership – dynamically enhancing the results of your business’™

At Transforming Performance, we believe that there are 6 crucial areas of Leadership: focus and direction, mindset, engagement, skills, impact and systems.

Transforming Performance can help with our Accelerate Your Business™ and Accelerate Solo™ programmes.

Julie Hutchison is co-Director with Jan Sargent of Transforming Performance, a consultancy which provides businesses with expert support in Leadership Coaching, Team Development and Performance Coaching, Executive Coaching, Mentoring, Training and Behavioural Profiling and help in getting the best from you and your people. If you’d like to have a chat and a coffee to discuss how we can help you, we’d love to talk. Call us on:

01722 484155 or 07947 823842

[email protected]

http://www.transformingperformance.co.uk

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How To Get More Done

It’s Thursday!  How is this week going for you?  Are you on track to get everything done that you wanted to achieve this week?  Or have you been derailed?  Have you been side-tracked, or even overwhelmed, with all the things that were not on your To Do list on Monday morning, but somehow, have appeared on it during the last 3 days.

And if this describes your week – is it JUST this week, or is this a familiar pattern?

You see, studies show To Do lists are not very useful in the quest for ‘getting stuff done’.  And there are many reasons for this but the number one reason is that people aren’t very good at estimating time.  (In a recent study only 17% of people were able to fairly accurately estimate time). In this specific context, they are not very good at estimating the time it takes to do something and therefore there is too much on their TO DO lists, and it’s probably not the right stuff anyway.

Well about a month ago we held a web class about getting more done.  Most people thought it was going to be about ‘To Do’ lists or other ‘time management’ tools or tactics.

Most people were wrong.

Because the key to getting more done has little to do with time management.  Let’s face it – we all have the same amount of time in the day.  And just working harder doesn’t create any more time.  If you have too much on your ‘To Do’ list, then just working harder won’t get it all done.  Prioritising won’t get it all done.  The only way to create more time for yourself, and get back a day a week (which is the theme of the web class), is to Think, Be and Do as a Leader.

The web class addresses these 3 areas in more detail – what does it mean to Think, Be and Do, as a Leader and how does that create more time back in your life? Let’s face it, most of us are ‘too busy’ and most of us run late for meetings and appointments – and if we only look at the ‘time management’ aspects of that then we are not solving the real problem.

I mean, sure – if you are constantly running late for meetings there are apps you can use to remind you/you can plan to leave earlier/or you can just stay as you are and hope people forgive your tardiness. None of these solutions actually solves the problem.  You are still too busy, which is why you are running late.

So, if you are finding yourself too overwhelmed with the “busy-ness” of the week, and this is not the first time you have felt like this, then this is one web class you should definitely make time for. The people who showed up for this web class when we ran it last month, loved it.  They found it gave them a different perspective and some actual golden nuggets (NOT the cereal!) that they could take away and use.

It also gave them the opportunity to book in for one of our free strategy sessions, that we occasionally offer to overwhelmed and overworked managers, like you.

Here is the link to watch the replay – Reclaim Your Week Webclass – at any time to suit you.

Or if you already know you have an issue with overwhelm and being too busy, and you know you would like one of the free sessions – then email me now on [email protected]

3D Leadership – dynamically enhancing the results of your business’™

At Transforming Performance, we believe that there are 6 crucial areas of Leadership: focus and direction, mindset, engagement, skills, impact and systems.

Transforming Performance can help with our Accelerate Your Business™ and Accelerate Solo™ programmes.

Julie Hutchison is co-Director with Jan Sargent of Transforming Performance, a consultancy which provides businesses with expert support in Leadership Coaching, Team Development and Performance Coaching, Executive Coaching, Mentoring, Training and Behavioural Profiling and help in getting the best from you and your people. If you’d like to have a chat and a coffee to discuss how we can help you, we’d love to talk. Call us on:

01722 484155 or 07947 823842

[email protected]

http://www.transformingperformance.co.uk